Equestrians often deprive themselves of self abundance, self indulgence, self care for their creative nature.

Checking in.

Last week, the Fifth Week. Recovering a sense of Possibility

This week you were being asked to examine your pay-offs in remaining stuck. You explored how you curtail your own possibilities by placing limits on the good you can receive. You examined the cost of settling for appearing good instead of being authentic. You might have found yourself thinking about radical changes, no longer ruling out your growth by making others the cause of your constriction.

How many days this week did you complete the morning pages? Are you starting to like them at all? Have you discovered somewhere around a page and a half the truth point — a place you let go and start to touch something real?

Did you do your artist date this week? Did you find any answers in that time, when you listened… did you listen? What did you do? How did it feel? Have you done anything adventurous on your dates yet?

Did you experience any synchronicity this week? (Magical coincidences that supported your stated aim?) Try talking about it with other folks, see if they experience any of the same kind of magic.

Week 6:

Recovering a Sense of Abundance

Remember: Creativity is the natural order of life. Life is energy: pure, creative energy. There is an underlying, in-dwelling creative force infusing all of life — including ourselves. It is safe to open ourselves up to greater and greater creativity. Our creative dreams and yearnings come from a divine source. As we move toward our dreams, we move toward our divinity.

Money is God in Action.
Raymond Charles Barker

True life is lived when tiny changes occur.
Tolstoy

The Sixth Week. Recovering a sense of Abundance

 

The Great Creator.

When we think about Life, about the energy that flows through life — we don't tend to believe it gets involved with money. If we are religious, we may believe money is below God's interest. We think that in the material world we're on our own, that we'll pursue our dreams… when we can afford it. We want life energy, or our God, to feel like a big fat paycheck and a license to spend as we please.

Listening to the siren song of “more!” we are deaf to the still, small voice waiting in our soul that whispers “You are enough.”

We cling to our financial concerns as a way to avoid not only our art, our dreams, but our spiritual growth. “I have to keep a roof over my head,” we state, “no one is going to pay me to be more creative.”

This stems from an old belief that our dreams and goals, and life's intent for us, are at opposite ends of a spectrum. “I want to be an actress, but God wants me to be a waitress.” We think work has to feel like… Work. It can't be fun, it can't be play, it can't be a source of delight.

We equate difficulty with virtue and art with fooling around. Hard work is good. If it hurts, if it wears us down, it must be building our moral fiber. If it comes easily to us, then it's cheap.

Take a look at how life itself has been in its approach to creativity. Did nature make one pink flower? Two or three? How about thousands… maybe life is inclined to be abundant, to be creative, to play.

We feel a real skepticism when someone suggests that life, or God, is on our side and supporting us already — we just have to spread our wings to catch the breeze and start to sail. When it comes time for us to choose between a cherished dream and lousy, current, drudgery, we tend to ignore the dream and blame our misery on God, or say “That's just the way life works. I'm a grown up, I have put away childish dreams.”

We have tried to be sensible. As though we have any proof that Life is sensible. Life, in fact, takes great delight in supporting healthy extravagant dreams.

Making art has everything to do with play, and what we want to do is really what we were meant to do. When we do what we are meant to do, doors open to us, financing appears for us, we feel useful and the work we do feels… like play.

Luxury

For those of us who have become spiritually anorexic, yearning to be creative and refusing to feed that hunger in ourselves, becoming more and more focused on deprivation, a little authentic luxury goes a long way. The key word is AUTHENTIC.

We need to pamper ourselves, art is born in expansion. This pampering takes different forms for different people, it can mean having a flower in a vase by your bed, or listening to your real favorite music, or buying a new pair of jeans, or a magazine subscription.

Money is NEVER an authentic block. The block is our feeling of constriction, powerlessness. Art requires us to empower ourselves with a sense of choice. This means, at it's most basic, to take care of ourselves.

You can rise to the top of your field, and be recognized internationally, and acclaimed everywhere for the creative, unique contribution you have made to the world… and still feel empty inside. Your life's work becomes… work.

This stems from denying yourself luxury… not white dogs, diamonds, and a yacht, but the luxury of time with real friends, time to just kick back and relax, time to think for yourself, to explore your dreams. The luxury of enjoying your life.

What do we do when we indulge ourselves? We immediately begin to discount the joy we feel — “so you bought yourself a nice horse. I hope you know you'll never have time to ride it! Not to mention the cost, and they break down, and… So, you found a really wonderful husband or wife, I hope you are aware that you will have no time to spend with him, that you're already over the hill, the probably the relationship won't work…” We have a deep belief that it's RESPONSIBLE to discount joy.

Unable to indulge ourselves, unable to replenish the batteries because we throw the gifts back even as we receive them, we start relying on past work, technique, tricks, practicing a craft instead of developing our art.

What gives you true joy? That is the question to ask regarding luxury. Fresh raspberries is as valid an answer as a day on the beach in Maui. Blocked creatives are the Cinderellas of the world. Focusing on others at our own expense, we may even be threatened by the idea of spoiling ourselves. Don't lose Cinderella, just focus on that glass slipper.

Creative living requires space for ourselves, even if it's just a bookshelf that is all our own. Remember, your inner artist is a child, and children like the word MINE. My chair, my book, my pillow.

Much of what we do in recovering creativity seems silly. It is. Silly is a defense our wet blanket adult critic tosses in our face when we start to play. Yes, artist dates are silly. That is the whole point.

Counting, an exercise.

For the next week you will be discovering how you spend your money. Buy a small notepad and write down every nickel you spend. It doesn't matter how large or small the amount, write it down.

Be meticulous and thorough, what did you buy? How much? Be non-judgemental, just keep a record. This is self observation, not self flagellation.

Keep this up for the week, keep it up longer if you can. Notice what you value in terms of your spending, see whether you fritter away cash on things you don't cherish and deny yourself things that you do.

For many of us counting is a prelude to creative luxury.

Money Madness: An exercise

Complete the following phrases:

  • People with money are…
  • Money makes people…
  • I'd have more money if…
  • My dad thought money was…
  • My mom always thought money would…
  • In my family, money caused…
  • Money equals: …
  • If I had money, I would…
  • If I could afford it I would…
  • If I had some money I would…
  • I'm afraid that if I had money I would…
  • Money is…
  • Money causes…
  • Having money is not…
  • In order to have more money I would need to…
  • When I have money I usually…
  • I think money…
  • If I weren't so cheap I'd…
  • People think money…
  • Being broke tells me…

Tasks.

The Sixth Week

Morning pages and Artists date — remember, it's supposed to delight you.

Do the money madness exercise

Count your spending.

  1. Natural Abundance: Collect five neat rocks.
  2. Natural Abundance: Pick five flowers or leaves. Consider pressing them between wax paper.
  3. Clearing: Check your closet, do you have 5 pieces of ratty clothing you can toss? Five objects you no longer love?
  4. Creation: Bake something, or cook something.
  5. Re-read the basic principles once daily. Read your artist's prayer once daily.
  6. Clearing: Any new changes in your home environment? Make some.
  7. Acceptance: Any new flow in your life? Practice saying yes.
  8. Prosperity: be aware of any changes in your financial situation, or in your perspective on it. Any new — even crazy — ideas about things you'd love to do?

I’ll be posting my check-in notes to the comments. Please share your experiences from Week Five's exercises, if you need support in an area you’re struggling with reach out for encouragement.

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One Comment

  1. How many days this week did you complete the morning pages?

    5 out of 7 days.

    Are you starting to like them at all?

    I struggled a great deal with committing to the morning pages this week and almost began to loathe them.

    Have you discovered somewhere around a page and a half the truth point — a place you let go and start to touch something real?

    Not in the morning pages, but I have started writing in the evenings before bed and touching on some excellent truths for myself. Digging deep without censorship. I think this is a positive change for me, I’ve always found I’m happier and more relaxed when I write regularly, openly and honestly and this feels in alignment with that old habit I set down for too long. I’ve also found a change in my overall attitude this week for the better and all around feel more joyous and playful.

    Did you do your artist date this week? Did you find any answers in that time, when you listened… did you listen? What did you do? How did it feel? Have you done anything adventurous on your dates yet?

    My artists dates continue to be fairly bland. This week it was spent in the company of the horses, without motive or intent. Just hanging with them in their own manner. Observing them like this is like salve for my soul so I felt the take-away was positive.

    Did you experience any synchronicity this week? (Magical coincidences that supported your stated aim?) Try talking about it with other folks, see if they experience any of the same kind of magic.

    Synchronicity continues to be strong. I see it around me in other people, events, opportunities, and even in the seemingly random.

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